Sleep is a symptom of caffeine deprivation.  

The time has come. Though I have often argued that I am not addicted to anything, least of all caffeine, I am now proven wrong. I can picture it now: I stand there, adamantly stating that "I am NOT addicted to caffeine! I simply enjoy coffee once in a while. Maybe I love it, but certainly I'm not addicted." In my mind, I can see various people with whom I have argued this.... And here, with the strong potential of witnesses, I admit it. You were right. I was wrong.

ADDICTION, Noun:

an abnormally strong craving 

(now that part, I understand)

the state of being abnormally tolerant to and dependent on something

that is psychologically or physically habit-forming

(Who, me?)

the state of being enslaved to a habit or practice or 

to something to such an extent 
that its cessation causes severe trauma. 

(does a two day headache count as severe trauma?)

The condition of being habitually or 
compulsively occupied with or or involved in something.

("habitually" is such an ugly word...) 

  need for and use of a habit-forming substance
characterized by tolerance and
by well-defined physiological symptoms upon withdrawal.

(physiological. Now there's a word I haven't heard in a while)

I know, I went a bit overboard on the definitions. But how could I resist the dozens of fantastic adjectives and adverbs provided? To pass up the chance to use such words would have been a travesty.  And there you have it. The last two days have given me what may be the worst headache of my life. It started easily enough.. I woke up one morning, and didn't make coffee. Alas, what consequences that lack of an action brought! I assumed that it would fade eventually. 15 hours later, I hoped that sleep would assuage it. 8 hours after that, I faintly wondered when it would go away. 10 more hours passed, and I knew it wouldn't. A triple shot caramel macchiato barely touched it. Two more shots of espresso, and it vanished. I, being the logical, calmly thinking person that I am... (ha!), know exactly what you other logical people are thinking... "Shouldn't she NOT have had coffee if she knows it's the cause of headaches?" Well, in fact, I was having coffee to be sure that it was indeed a caffeine headache. After all, it could have been a brain tumor. Or possibly a concussion. Perhaps a subdural hemorrhage. Maybe even cardiac arrest. (well, maybe not that, but you get the idea)

However, I am now nearly certain that caffeine is my culprit. Or rather, the lack thereof. No more will I fruitlessly argue that I have never been addicted to caffeine. Now, I have a choice to make: I can either deal with the headaches for a few days (hopefully not weeks) and then make sure I don't drink coffee every day, OR... I can go on shamelessly savoring latte after latte. Grande. Venti. Whatever size I want.

Sadly, though, I am one of those people who hates the idea of being that dependent on anything, let alone a lame little chemical addiction. Ergo, my decision:  Somehow, some way, I will have to reduce my macchiato happiness to only every other day. I am still trying to decide if Paris is caffeinated enough to also be banned.(perish the thought!)

For those of you who are not weeping for me by now, here are some quotes to bring it home...

No one can understand the truth until he drinks 

of coffee's frothy goodness.  

~Sheik Abd-al-Kadir

A morning without coffee is like sleep. 

Decaffeinated coffee is the devil's blend.

The morning cup of coffee has an exhilaration about it 

which the cheering influence of the afternoon 

or evening cup of tea cannot be expected to reproduce. 

~Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

Need I say more?

 

When Breaks the Dawn

This morning brings with it the anticipation of wonderful things. At the moment, my hands are frozen, because I have just spent a lovely 45 minutes outside, watching the sun rise. The second that the last drop of coffee disappeared (goodness, I have no idea how that happened...) my brain decided that keeping warm wasn't a good idea. Therefore, please excuse any typos. I'm finding that typing with stiff fingers ends in frustration.
But I digress.
After seeing the mountain turn various shades of gold, blue, and violet, I got bored with trying to take pictures of it. Apparently, my little camera doesn't like to actually capture the mountain as it really is. (it takes a mammoth snow covered hill, and reduces it to a teensy, cloudy blob that looks much further away than it is) So, I (in a very sneaky manner, I assure you) went and got mom's camera, hoping for better results. Nope. Which leaves me to conclude one thing-- I lack the finesse required to get a good shot of the mountain. Of course, the tree in the way brings me some comfort. Also, I'm trying to convince you that we really do have a fantastic view of the mountain from our deck... I simply can't manage to get it on film.
Though I enjoyed solitude for the most part, I was eventually joined by several others. Namely, too many squirrels. I have often expressed my dislike for these grimy rat-relatives, and that still stands. They disgust me. They are far too bold. Anyhow, they dashed around the trees, chasing each other and chattering loudly. However, a much more welcome visitor was a blue jay, that nearly took a year off of my life when he came skyrocketing out of the bushes. I felt like he should've had a japanese accent, a red headband, and been screaming "Kamikaze!" Now, wouldn't that have made a good picture!

The Papa's Sermons....

Sovereign Grace Baptist Church Sermons page.

It's three in the morning... You really think that I could come up with a good title at this hour?

I have nothing else creative left in me. It is 3:10 a.m, and I should be sleeping. When I get tired, I become over-contemplative. Also, words like "emotional" and "insecure" and "moody" come to mind... Basically, when I'm lacking in sleep, mood swings are sure to follow.
I've been thinking through so many things recently, that I'm not even sure what to blog about. Of course, that's never stopped me before, so I'll give it my best shot. I have enjoyed blissful absolute silence for the last three hours, and hopefully will be able to actually sleep when I'm done here.
Anyone who talks to me moderately often already knows this, but for those of you who don't.... Recently, my uncle edited a puritan devotional, called "Voices From The Past."  As it just so happens, it's out of stock everywhere. Also, it recently made the CVBBS current bestsellers list... But those are extraneous facts that aren't pertinent to what i'm saying. (I just am tickled pink about the whole bestsellers thing, so what better place to say it than on my blog?) And now for the semi-pertinent facts... I got the book for Christmas, and have been reading out of it. A few days ago, I read something that was actually just what I needed at the time. Apparently, it's still exactly what I need... Why else would it come to mind at this time of night?

So, here are a few parts of it.

      But seek ye first the kingdom of God,

and his righteousness,

 and all these things will be added unto you.

Matthew 6:33

Until we get our hearts out of the world, how easily our hearts are carried away with the thoughts of earthly concerns. Until we can separate and purge our spirits, how we mingle our prayers with many ridiculous thoughts.....we should always labour to get our hearts above the world into the presence of God, as if we were by Him in heaven, and wholly swallowed up with His glory. Though our bodies are on earth, our spirits should be in heaven. Until we get above the mists of the world, we can see nothing of clearness and comfort; but when we can get God and our hearts together, then we can see there is much in the fountain, though nothing in the stream; and though little on earth, yet we have a God in heaven. This is our great aim, to be with God in heaven. His residence is there, and we seek that our hearts might be there. We have liberty to ask supplies for the outward life, but chiefly we should ask spiritual and heavenly things. .... it is far more pleasing to Him when we ask for grace. In every prayer we should seek to be made more heavenly minded by conversing with our heavenly Father.

---Thomas Manton, Works, I:60-62

Ed: Richard Rushing

uber-edited by me.

Well, there you have it. My thought, or rather Manton's thought, for the evening. Now, I'm hoping to go to sleep. With any luck, no one will feel the need to wake me up before noon.